Intervention - With a little help from our friends
by broomvsbubble
Summary: Sometimes you need a pair of fresh eyes to solve a problem. In this case Polly has the questionable privilege of doing just that.
1. Chapter 1

Intervention – With a little help from our friends

A muffled moan. Screaming - followed by the horrific sound of something heavy breaking. Then a crash to the floor.

Those are the sounds that greet Polly once she enters the small student apartment she shares with her lifelong friend Piper.

Fearing for her friend's safety Polly does not even think to hesitate: dropping the heavy bags she has been carrying and instead picking up the pointy umbrella always kept by the door she charges into her roommate's bedroom – only to be greeted by a sight far more terrifying than she could have ever imagined:

„Pol! You're not supposed to be back yet!" It comes out more of a screech than an actual sentence. Beet red and clutching a sheet to her exposed front a bewildered Piper is looking back at her – her disheveled hair as well as the very naked woman kneeling beside the now slightly askew and broken bed-frame leaving no room for doubt as to what exactly has happened here only moments ago.

Before Polly is even able to process everything she is seeing the woman on the floor rises, hastily grabbing a black dress from the floor, pulling it over her head, smoothing it out while simultaneously searching for and successfully retrieving signature black secretary glasses as well as a pair of killer high heels. As if she has been putting on an armor her demeanor changes immediately and Polly is met with the confidence she has grown to automatically associate with the woman. Passing the shocked brunette the woman pushes the glasses up into her hair and has the audacity to wink before nodding her head in greeting -"Holly." then without turning around she directs a quick wave over her shoulder at Piper: „See you around, kid!" The next moment she is gone- hips swaying as if she owns the place.

Flabbergasted Polly turns around to look at Piper for any sort of explanation, but her friend just sinks into the pillows behind her, hands covering her face and shaking her head as if to make this whole situation go away by sheer will.

Ten minutes later finds the two friends sitting awkwardly in the kitchen, two steaming cups of hot chocolate in front of them. Despite the late hour Polly feels wide awake, a million questions running through her head. Her fingers strumming on the table of their own accord signaling her impatience. Piper however seems to be a million miles away, the mug resting in her hands the most fascinating thing in the world. Seeing that the blonde seems adamant to just stare into her mug Polly decides she will have to make the first move. Unwilling to keep the suspense any longer she goes for the blunt approach:

„Soo... are you and Supercunt like a thing now?"

It gets Piper's attention: her head snaps up, her eyes widen: „No." Comes the quick reply -defiant-, followed by what Polly likes to call 'the patented Piper chin move of stubbornness'. She is staring into the mug again. There is more to the story. Something that Piper is not necessarily willing to share.

„Are you sure? Because from were I was standing you two looked pretty intimate!" she pauses, still no response, so she tries again: „I mean, seriously Piper?! What was that?! If you haven't noticed: you broke the fucking bed! And don't even let me get started on the fact that it was with Supercunt! Supercunt! Who by the way - is a woman! ….Wait, does that mean you are gay now?!" Polly does not intend for it to come out so accusatory she is just so overwhelmed by the situation, trying to make sense of it all. Realizing that she should communicate this to Piper, who at the moment seems to be retrieving further and further into her shell, Polly grabs the blonde's hand, giving it a gentle and reassuring squeeze. When Piper looks up she gives her a little nod and an encouraging smile. It works, Piper takes a deep breath and with a small sigh responds:

„No, Polly, it doesn't mean I'm „gay now" -she puts the last part of the sentence in air quotes. „And it certainly doesn't mean I'm with Alex. It means... It means... - Honestly I don't know what it means... „ she trails off, her fingers playing with the mug. She watches them for a while – as if they belong to someone else. Then she shrugs – helplessly-, going silent again.

Not willing to accept that Polly gently prods further:

„You mean it just happened?"

„Yes, it just happened." Piper's eyes are searching out the corners of the room. Polly tries to unsuccessfully catch her gaze, but uncomfortable as she might appear, Piper has not left the room yet and Polly thinks of that as a small victory. „15 months ago. - And than again … and again." Piper meets Polly's eyes now. Her cheeks rosy from the blush that has been spreading across them during her speech. It feels like a confession long overdue.

Polly sees the vulnerability in Piper's eyes and it hurts her to think that her best friend has felt like she had to keep what despite her put on indifference seems to be an important part of her life a secret from her.

„We were at a party that first time - you were off with Pete – I think it was the weekend you two went up to Maine - and Nicky was off somewhere – trying to woo Lorna. ... The party sucked. So Alex and I got wasted." Piper smiles at the memory. „ Long story short: We ended up in one of the bedrooms..." She ducks her head. Shrugging. Her eyes are searching out Polly's, as if to gauge her reaction. „ What can I say, Polly...It was unlike anything I had ever experienced before! I mean Alex was just so... „For a second Polly thinks she can see true fondness in Piper's eyes, but the blonde blinks and the look goes away.

„Anyway, the next day was Cal's birthday, so I had to go home, visit my family – I got the usual questions from aunts and uncles about how well I was doing in school and if I had found a boyfriend/ future husband yet,"at this Piper rolls her eyes. Polly can sympathize – living in the same neighborhood she has been raised with similar expectations and forms of etiquette.

„They kept on and on about how proud I was making the family and that I had always been such a good example for their children etc. ." Piper shakes her had sadly, Polly thinks she can make out small tears forming at the corners of her eyes.

„ And …...I don't know, Polly, they got into my head... So when I met Alex again, I told her that what had happened at the party was only due to the alcohol and that it could never happen again... She was like „whatever" – you know that huff and shrug she does when she's bored with something? It was weird but I thought I had no reason to complain having gotten exactly what I wanted. - And all was well and good for a month … except that I got these cravings, you know?" The blush is back and this time it is full on.

"Whenever I looked at Alex I couldn't help but notice how incredibly hot she was! I mean before that party I never considered myself a very sexual person, but Alex made me feel things..." Piper is taking a big sip of her chocolate now, as if to stop herself from saying to much „Anyway, „the index finger of her right hand is slowly tracing invisible lines on the kitchen table. Her face deep in thought. „ I must have been too obvious, because one day Alex told me that if I wanted to do it again all I had to do was ask... so, after one more month of torture I gave in to temptation … we agreed that we were in it purely for the physical fun. Friends with benefits. No strings attached: We agreed to meet up at the end of each month and … you know... if one of us was seeing someone else at the time the deal was off." Piper is emphasizing this with a hand gesture.

Realization is dawning upon Polly: „Piper Elisabeth Chapman! You dirty whore! That's why all of the guys I set you up with didn't work out!" She is pointing an accusatory finger at the blonde now. "You were sabotaging those relationships just so you would be free at the end of each month to meet up with Supercunt!"

"What?! No!" Piper looks honestly taken aback. Then she seems to think it over again. "Alright … maybe on a subconscious level? That woman knows what she's doing Polly..."

"Yes, yes, she's Supercunt, God's gift to the lesbians and so on blabla... we all know that! Even I have to admit that she's got game and on some level I can see that that might be exciting. What I don't buy is that you would enter into a physical relationship "purely for the fun of it". That's not you Piper! That first time with Jeremy? It took you forever to give in! Because you wanted to be sure about your feelings for the guy, before you slept with him! You were always the one who told me that sex was only really good if you were in love with your partner. Now all of that has changed? You give it up just like that? "She snaps her fingers." Because of Supercunt's magic fingers? I don't buy it!"

"Who says it has changed?!" It comes out as a snap. Piper is angry now. Angry about Polly's speech or angry about her own feelings, Polly does not know, but she suspects the latter.

Piper continues much quieter: "It hasn't. I still think that sex is best when you're in love. Alex doesn't disprove that."

"You mean … you mean you actually love her?" Polly has not expected that.

Piper just shrugs helplessly: "It just doesn't matter, you see? It doesn't matter what I feel - because Alex clearly doesn't feel anything. You know how she is – Little Miss Womanizer - always with some girl: she broke the meetings off three times in the last five months, Pol!" Piper's right hand is picking up invisible crumbs from the table surface. It is quiet for a few seconds. "That and remember the Sylvie period last year? They were together for six months! So what if I feel the need to be available to her at the end of each month – she clearly doesn't feel the same." Piper looks truly heartbroken now.

"The worst part of it is that instead of bringing us closer together, this whole thing is ripping us apart. I mean apart from our meetings , "Piper ducks her head, still not entirely comfortable with the situation; "I've barely even seen Alex these past months. "Polly silently nods, it is true, even she has noticed the dark haired woman's significant absence during their last outings... which was unusual because ever since Piper had met Alex in the library freshman year of college Nicky and Alex had become a permanent fixture in Piper's life and therefore inevitably in Polly's. And even though she still pretended to be offended by Nicky's bluntness or put off by Alex's confidence she had secretly grown fond of the other women's presence – their hearts were in the right place and there was never a dull moment around them.

"I mean I admit part of that is my fault – I never call her... it just... got so hard, you know? Being around her, not being able to touch her and watch all those girls make eyes at her...

I couldn't bear it. So I just started looking forward to that one night of the month were she was all mine, you know? That had to be enough..."Another shrug. Then defiant Piper is back. "You know what, I should stop complaining. One night a month is more than other people have, right?"

"You mean one night of wild lesbian monkey sex?" Polly winks, trying to lighten the mood.

Piper laughs - despite herself, Polly silently congratulates herself for a job well done. "That's one way of putting it... even though the sex really is goooood! I mean I came 7 times before -"

"I so rudely interrupted?" Polly smirks but then realizes what Piper has just said." And eww, Piper, that is too much information! The images are still to fresh! Do we have bleach? I think I need to gouge my eyes out...!" She is dramatically searching the table with her hands.

Both laugh. But then the atmosphere gets serious again.

"Piper? ….Why didn't you tell me?"

Piper is looking down at the table. "I'm sorry, Pol. I wanted to tell you. It's just... I was afraid. I mean casual sex with a woman?! That goes against everything our parents have taught us! I was afraid that you'd be grossed out – that I would lose you." Polly feels her heart swell.

"Hey, Piper. Piper, look at me." When she has the other woman's attention the brunette continues. "I will not lie, I was surprised by what I saw tonight. "She pauses for dramatic effect and to drive her next point home." But I would never ever be grossed out by who you choose to love! - Except, you know – a really young minor", Polly cannot help but joke, but grows serious again: "I love you, Piper, you are my best friend and I support you, no matter what!"

At this Piper laughs, relieved. She uses her sleeve to wipe away the tears of emotion that start to form in her eyes. "Thank you for listening, Pol. I'm so sorry I didn't trust you sooner..." She smiles.

"Come here, you big lesbian." Polly pulls her in for a hug. It is comfortable, now that the secret is out the air feels light again. However, Polly still sees the pain in Piper's eyes from when she made her confession in front of her mind's eye. Determined to help her friend in her head a plan starts to form...


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for all the kind reviews, follows, favorites and messages everyone! They have all made me so happy! Here comes chapter II. I have tried to work in a few of your requests :-)**

All it takes is one phone call and Polly's mind is made up, the conversation pretty much confirming all that she has already suspected before.

A couple of days later operation 'Vauseman' is on its way. The infantile need for a code name a sore reminder of who exactly her partner in crime in this operation will be.

"Everything is all set!"

Nicky Nichols in all her wild haired glory plops into the chair beside her. Her eyes displaying a level of excitement, bordering on mania, that has Polly second guessing her decision to get the strawberry blonde involved. But this is kind of a last ditch effort to help her best friend get what she truly wants. And beggars can't be choosers after all.

They have kindly been allowed to set up their 'headquarters' in "Red's" kitchen. The cozy little restaurant is run by Galina Reznikov, a woman who Nicky considers more of a mother than the woman who has 'raised' or in better words 'neglected' her all these years before she went off to college. Reznikov's place of business with the dimmed lights and thousands of candles on every surface imaginable is the perfect setting for what they have in mind:

Their plan is to set Piper and Alex up on a first real date. It is a plan that they have not communicated to the two women in question, of course. Instead both Piper and Alex think that they are being set up on an ordinary blind date by their friends. It took some serious nagging and in Nicky's case even bribery to convince their respective targets to agree to this, but in the end both have promised to show up. Polly suspects Piper of having only relented to make the brunette stop from trying to cheer her up. She knows that Piper knows that a date with another person will not help her get over Alex, but she is glad that the blonde is at least willing to humor her. The trap is set like this: Piper is instructed to upon arrival ask for a table under the name of Harper, Alex respectively for a reservation under the name of Nichols. The staff have been told to run the same table under both names.

It is Nicky's idea to use "the wires" – insisting that it would feel even more like a covered mission if they were tuned in live "to the action". Polly is a little bit hesitant at first but in the end she agrees if only for Piper's sake – because this gives her a way to intervene should things go south.

So they have prepped the nicest table in the restaurant – the one next to the little indoor pond with the water lilies and the floating tea lights, by taping a cell phone set on speaker underneath the table surface, the overhanging white table cloth effectively hiding it from sight.

For now, all they have to do is wait.

Nicky is the first to break the silence. She guffaws: "So you really had no idea? With all the eye fucking that's been going on lately?! Seriously, at one point I thought Stretch was going to just jump her – right there – in the middle of Professor Middlestein's class!"

Polly ponders it over again: she should have seen it – thinking about it they did act weird... but from her experience of seeing Piper dating boys after boys in high school and gushing about the latest male movie star, she had been so utterly convinced that Piper was straight that she had not even considered that that statement might not be 100 % true and that in fact her friend might actually be interested in one of her closest female friends.

At that moment – saving Polly from answering the question - the cell phone in the middle of their table – the one with the adhesive tape taped across the microphone - comes to life: They hear the loud and screeching sound of a chair being moved, then it goes quiet again.

Only a few moments later:

"Here you are: Harper, table for two."

"Piper?" The husky voice belonging to Alex resonates. "What are you doing here?"

"Alex! Hi!" A reluctant pause, then like a confession and an apology all in one, in a rushed out ramble: "Polly forced me into this stupid blind date... I'm sorry they must have gotten the tables mixed up. I'm gonna go ask them again. Nice running into you -" The departing sounds of her high heels clicking on the floor do not last long, then:

"Wait!" Polly releases a breath she has not realized she has been holding. Then Alex's voice can be heard again, although quieter: "Pipes? … I have a suspicion that this might not be a mix up. I'm here on a "blind" date, too, you see? Urgh! I'm gonna kill Nicky! All the secrecy? Nicky insisting on making the reservation under her name?" They hear what sounds like an exasperated laugh. "I should have suspected something was up!"

An awkward silence follows. Then:

"Oh, won't you sit down? I don't bite!" A laugh, Polly knows this is Alex trying to make light of the situation. Silence again and Polly fears they have goaded Piper to far. Then a chair screeches and Nicky gives her a thumbs up.

"You look really nice tonight, Piper." Alex's confession does not have time to ring true, because that is the moment another female voice – their waitress for the evening – a girl named Gina – who Polly now silently vows to strangle by the end of the night - chooses to interrupt.

Polly and Nicky hear Alex and Piper order red wine and request a reprieve on the food order. When Gina's footsteps finally depart the awkward silence is back.

Surprisingly it is broken by Piper's voice this time as she is letting out a small giggle.

As if infected Alex lets out a laugh, too, although she sounds a bit bemused: "What?"

"It's just...This feels weird! Doesn't it? This setting? Us, dressed up like this – sitting at a table so formally." Her voice changes, taking on a slightly more somber note: " Did you ever think we'd end up on a date together?"

Silence, then Alex's voice. It sounds contemplative, too: "Remember how we met? That time I 'randomly' bumped into you at the library?"

It is the way she says it that makes Polly think she can literally see her making air quotes at the word 'randomly'. Nicky, too, has her eyebrows raised in suspicion.

Piper laughs. "I remember that that is the version of our first encounter that you gave Nicky and had me tell Polly!" Then quieter, reflecting: "That's not exactly the way we really met though, isn't it, Alex? If I remember correctly the first time we spoke you had just been given -"

Instead of hearing the end of that sentence Polly and Nicky can only hear some kind of rustling over the phone. Then: "Ouch! What was that for? Rest assured your dirty little secret's safe with me, you big wuss! I can't believe you never told Nicky you won …."

Again with the noise interference. "Can't believe she never told Nicky what?!" Polly can see Nicky rising, hands on the table, looking at the phone with urgency. She cannot help but laugh at how distressed the other woman is looking right now.

"Shh! Nicky doesn't need to know that! She would never let me live it down!" Nicky lets out a defeated yelp- the rustling has started again.

They can hear a short squeak followed by a giggle that does definitely belong to Piper: "Why not? I think it's cute! … And why are you whispering?!"

"Nicky has her ways...Seriously I can just feel her listening in on this! That woman lives for opportunities of blackmail!"

It is quiet and for a second Polly fears that they are looking under the table,

but then Alex laughs: "Look at me getting all paranoid!" Her voice changes, she is teasing now: "So what was that? I'm cute?"

Polly just knows that this is followed by a smug expression complete with pursed lips and the signature raised eyebrow.

"What? Nooooooo." Piper is using her 'cute' voice now, clearly as a way to distract the dark haired woman. It does not seem to work though, because they hear her give in: "Alright, Alex, yes I think it's cute that you secretly write poetry! As a matter of fact I think you should let more people read it! It's really good! They didn't put your framed poem up on the library wall for nothing! Your poem won that contest by a mile!"

"Ha!" At this Nicky jumps up in the air, her fist pumping by her side: "I knew it! That little...!" Shaking her head she sits back down quickly, unwilling to miss what comes next, but that little piece of information is stored away in her crazy head for future mischief of that Polly is sure. She almost feels sorry for Alex.

"I still liked yours better!" Alex's voice again. The next part they almost cannot make out for it comes out as a mumbling: "And if mine was good it was only because I had such a good muse to write about..."

"Really? Who?"

"Oh, you know, this breathtakingly beautiful, feisty little blonde in my English literature class. Really fascinating personality. Smart, too. Always sitting in the front row, always arguing with Prof. Hoffman." 'Hoffman', Polly remembers that name, has heard it a million times during her freshman year, her roommate always furious about something he had done. She silently counts to three. - One, two - And, as expected, Piper goes off again:

"Oh, that man was just a chauvinistic little dick! I can't believe nobody else in that class took offense at that! I mean 'the Taming of the Shrew' was clearly meant to be …." Suddenly she goes quiet. Realization setting in. "Oh... Alex! ...You never told me that...!"


End file.
